How to know your Hopkins ABCs all my lizzle freshizzles for the time bizzle
By Gina Callahan · The Johns Hopkins News-Letter · September 4, 2003
To make your transition to college easier, the News-Letter has provided you with a local lingo guide. You say you love the News-Letter already? Aww, thanks. Anyway, when you meet a BME who lives in the AMRs, leaving the beach and heading to D-level to study DifEq in order to avoid AcPro, we want you to have the correct response ready. Save the blank face for your classes. Welcome to Hopkins.
AC/Rec Center
Formerly known and still referred to as the Athletic Center, or AC for short, the Recreation Center, the new fitness mecca on campus, is where you can get your sweat on and the best place on campus to check out the opposite sex.
AcPro
Academic probation. To stay off, you gotta keep your GPA over 2.0. Don't be a dumb-ass.
AMRs
Alumni Memorial Residences, the dorms located on campus where the majority of Hopkins freshman will hang their hats. If you're here, you've probably already heard about housing and know that although these are the least amenable dormitories, they are also the most social.
APPT
A Place to Talk, a service provided by a group of your classmates trained as peer counselors. It's a good place to ... umm ... talk.
Arts & Crafts
The name bitter engineers give the School of Arts and Sciences. Usually reserved for the "writing intensive" majors such as History, Writing Seminars or Political Science.
Bawlmore
Your new home. So sorry about that.
The Beach
The giant green lawn outside of the library where students gather and frolic on nice days. The Beach is more of a student union than the actual student union.
There's neither water nor sand, but it is a good place to check out scantily clad coeds. We take what we can get.
Beruit
Also called beer pong, a drinking game often played by college students ... even those at JHU. After four years at Hopkins, you just might be an expert marksman.
Bloomberg
As in Michael, the current mayor of New York, a 1964 Hopkins alum and Phi Psi brother. Bloomberg is also known as the "anonymous donor" who paid to pave campus walkways in brick. Also the name of the building that's far far away, the School of Public Health, and the scholarship.
Brody
El Presidente.
BMA
The Baltimore Museum of Art, located on the south side of the Hopkins campus. Admission is free for Hopkins students, so go get your dose o' culture.
BME
Biomedical Engineering. A popular and ... gasp ... competitive program here at JHU. Most BME majors switch to something else by sophomore year.
Breezeway
Big set of stairs separating the upper and lower quads. The wheelchair ramp only goes up halfway, but that's far enough to read the banners and flyers that student groups post here.
Cafe Q
Located above M-Level of the MSE Library, this classy espresso bar makes the coffee that gets Hopkins kids through long nights of studying.
CollTown Shuttle
The oh-so reliable shuttle service between JHU and surrounding schools. Make sure you have your Hopkins ID and a backup plan if you want a ride.
CVP
Charles Village Pub, a local watering hole on Saint Paul Street.
CONDOM
The College of Notre Dame of Maryland, an all-girls Catholic school located to our north. (Not to be confused with condoms: free prophylactic devices that are stationed in various locations around campus because Hopkins thinks you need all the help you can get.)
D-Level
Lowest and most tomb-like level of the library. No cell phone service, but if you wait around long enough, you may catch a couple attempting the D-Level challenge (use your imagination).
Death Lane
The one southbound lane on the northbound side of Charles Street. It is closed all the time, except for rush hour in the morning. Every year someone forgets to look both ways and becomes windshield wiper fluid.
DifEQ
Differential Equations. Its a hard class that all you arts and crafts majors don't have to worry about.
E-Level
Located in Levering Hall and named after Eugene Levering, the Prohibition Party's first candidate for Congress from Maryland, E-Level was once ironically the student pub on campus. It is now a mediocre attempt at a lounge, but progress seems slow but sure.
Gatehouse
Dilapidated little green building on the corner of Charles and Art Museum Drive. The home of the News-Letter since 1965. Come visit! Free food.
Glass Pav
The opaque pavilion-like structure adjoining Levering Hall. Home of blood drives and corny orientation events.
HAC Lab
Homewood Academic Computing Lab. Open 24/7 except for a brief cleaning time slot on Sunday morning.
Health and Wellness (Center)
The place to go when you rock backwards in your AMR desk chair and slam your head on a concrete floor, or when you break the bones in the top of your foot getting out of a lofted McCoy bed to answer the phone at 3 a.m. Also your flu-shot, birth control, and overall "I feel icky and want my mommy" destination.
Hop Cops
Bold protectors of our little microcosm. These are also the guys that give you a ride home after the shuttles stop running.
The Hut
The University's first library, located in Gilman Hall (the one with the big bell tower), that now serves as a 24-hour reading room/sauna. The Hut becomes the popular place to be during midterms after the library closes at 2 a.m.
IAP
Introduction to American Politics class taught by professor Benjamin Ginsburg. The class is worth going to just to hear Ginsburg's sarcastic take on American politics.
IFP
Introduction to Fiction and Poetry, an intro-level course in the Writing Seminars department. This will not be the most difficult class you take at Hopkins.
IR
International Relations, sub-major of the Political Science department and one of the most popular among Hopkins undergrads. Super-focused IR majors may compete for the accelerated 5-year BA/MA program in which they finish out their last two years at SAIS (Hopkins School of Advanced International Studies, located in D.C.).
J-Card
That little blue card they gave you when you arrived at college. Don't lose it, you'll need it.
Lax
Lacrosse. We're good, real good. 42 National Championships good. This year we made it all the way to the NCAA finals but lost to Virginia.
Master Plan
Refers to the University's improvement strategy, aimed at "making the campus pedestrian-friendly" and constructing all the time. Recently completed buildings include the Mattin Center, Hodson and Clark Halls, and the Athletic Center addition.
MCATs
The test you crazy pre meds are sweating over for years. Yes, it is that hard and yes, it does take a lot of studying to do well. Yes, it will determine the rest of your life and no, its not a cakewalk like the SATs.
MSE
Milton S. Eisenhower. Hopkins likes to name things after its 8th president (the man in charge during the same time his brother ran the country). The library is a good example. Familiarize yourself with the library. Know the library. Love the library.
New Jersey
Probably your home state.
Orgo
Organic Chemistry. Other schools call it O-chem. You can call it daddy.
Peabody
Another of Hopkins' nine divisions, Peabody Institute is one of the oldest and most prestigious musical conservatories in the country. Undergrads can minor in music at Peabody or just take lessons for credit. You'll also meet the occasional (crazy) dual-degree student, who splits his or her time between the Homewood campus and this downtown location.
PJs
Pub connected to the Charles apartment building right next to Wolman. If you are into stalking lacrosse players, this is the place to go.
RA
This is the person that busts you for drinking, writes you up for having a hotplate and makes you take copies of the News-Letter off of your walls because it is "fire hazard." This is also the person that helps you through freshman year, organizes events and if you're lucky could also be a good friend.
RoFo
Beloved Royal Farms, a convenience store on the corner of 33rd and Saint Paul Streets that will meet its end as part of the Master Plan. Get your fried chicken while you can.
Rotunda
Grungy shopping plaza, accessible via the Hopkins shuttle. Inside you can find a Giant supermarket, Rite Aid and Radio Shack.
SAC
Student Activities Commission, representative body of the campus student organizations.
Schnapp Shop
A local liquor store located on Calvert Street and 30th. Its a good place to pick up liquor once you hit the magical 21.
Sketchy
An adjective frequently uttered at Hopkins. I never used it much back home in my beloved Massachusetts, but trust me -- some things down here are only described as wicked sketchy.
Spring Fair
Large student-run fair that takes place in the spring, usually with some controversy. Food, music, rides, beer garden. Overall not a bad deal.
StuCo
You guessed it, Student Council. You're so smart.
TA
Grad student that runs sections in the larger classes or is just the person that helps out the professor. Your TA will probably not speak English but he/she is probably the person tabulating your grad, so be nice.
Throat
As in cut-throat, those fellow students who pull fire alarms the night before a big exam, steal notes and computers, and have already sold their souls and integrity for grades or something else.
Towson
Town to the North, home of the mall and the state university with the same name ... and girls rumored to be more attractive than we are. Don't get me started.
Uni-Mini
University Mini-Mart, convenience store directly across from RoFo. How do two similar stores stay afloat on adjacent blocks? Each has its own nuances. Uni-Mini staff, for example, will scoop you some ice cream and fix you up a grinder (or whatever you call them). Much like RoFo, Uni-Mini will be gone at the end of 2003.
Wawa
The Alpha Delta Phi fraternity currently located above University Mini-mart. There used to be a Wawa store there, so the name just stuck. This is the fraternity consisting of football players and other really really big guys.
WJHU
Hopkins' student-run radio station, located on the terrace level of McCoy and back in business after a lengthy hiatus. For now WJHU is only broadcast on the internet, but who knows what the future may hold. Requests can be made via IM (you can't avoid AIM at college; somewhere along the line it became a standard part of the culture.)